Guess what kids… Fashion month is over! And just before I curl up on my couch for the next 72 hours (yes, my dear mother, I’ll call you as soon as I can keep my eyes open), here are the five essentials fashion has taught me during these last few weeks.

1. – Fashion month is a marathon.* Next time around, if I don’t want to get back to Paris in shambles, on top of a personal shopper, I’m getting a personal trainer.

2. – Party animals don’t eat meals.** If you want, during the month of fashion weeks, you can sustain yourself quite fine on hors d’oeuvres, little fruit cups, cookies and champagne. The kind of fractional meals that are all in style, ideally unbalanced. My future trainer is already mad at me.

3. – Everyday, thank your camera.*** My camera decided it was done the last minute of the last hour at the end of the last show. Inanimate objects, don’t you have a soul****? I’m always saying that I should be giving my camera kisses just to thank him. Wash him up nice. Make his bed for him. Bring him coffee in the morning. Whisper sweet nothings to motivate him. Actually, I’m going to have to start personal training my camera so he doesn’t quit on me again.

4. – You’d better start learning English, now*****. Fashion is a world in English. Everyone speaks English. For two weeks now I’ve been talking to a friend, Sophie, in English. Right near the end we realized that we are neighbors. She is just as French as me. Sacrebleu!

5. – It takes so much effort to be effortless******! You see Alexandra, above, in the middle of getting rigging up to film her show “La Mode, La Mode, La Mode”? Well… That’s exaclty what fashion is. A tremendous amount of work for a few moments of amazement. But these passing moments, they make all the hours of work so worth it, don’t you think?

Big hugs to all and thanks for following me, motivating me, encouraging me… Hmm… Well… Actually… Thanks for being my personal trainer!!! Bonne journée!

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* : Quote from my future personal trainer.

** : Quote from Leigh, party animal.

*** : Quote from Scott, photographer.

**** : Quote from Alphonse, writer. The unabridged version: “Inanimate objects, do you have only a soul that clings to ours and forces it to love you?” Yep. My dear camera, how I loved you.

***** : Quote from Garance, professional yaourteuse******* since ’92.

****** : Quote from Anna, fashion director.

Translation : Tim Sullivan

******* Translator’s note: Here’s a quote from an e-mail from Garance explaining the concept of yaorteuse (loosely translated… yogurtist) to me… ““yaourteuse, it means a master of faux english where you don’t understand anything at all, like singing along ‘I waanagain nanana yes loveeee (you know, like I do all the time.)””