It was Konca (pronounced Konya, and yes, all Turkish first names are fantastic) who first told me that I needed to go to Istanbul, telling me I’d just love it, and seeing just how deep her eyes meant it, I had to book my flight immediately, just like that, smack dab in the middle of fashion week. Hypnotization. But we can stop talking about Istanbul for two seconds seeing as that’s not our subject for the day. I mean, c’mon, we can do this, right? No Istanbul.

Why fashion week? Because Konca is a fashion editor for Turkish Vogue and that’s where I met her the first time. At the fashion week. The wonderful world of fashion, but that’s not the subject either. I mean, c’mon, we can do this, not talk about fashion week either, right?

Nope.

The subject of this post, les enfants, is much more profound…

The subject of this post is: HOW IS IT THAT ALL THE COOLEST GIRLS ON EARTH WEAR THEIR JACKETS SLUNG OVER THEIR SHOULDERS IN A PERFECTLY EFFORTLESS WAY but not me?

Before you give me your harsh analysis, let me try to explain to you why I can’t.

The reasons why I NEVER wear my coat/trench/jacket/ slung over my shoulders in a perfectly effortless way are as follows:

1/ I never think to do it. NEVER. When I have a jacket, I put it on all the way. See how uncool I am?

2/ I just haven’t figured out how to sling my coat gracefully over my shoulder (It’s not easy!!!). It takes me eight hours to get it just right and then it falls off right away anyway.

3/ No seriously, it falls all the way off. The few times I actually have tried to wear my coat effortlessly over the shoulders, it fell and was lost forever.

So there you have it. It doesn’t work at all for me. And it’s a shame because wearing your coat this way separates right now (Four years ago, it was rolling jacket sleeves up, which took me two years to master, and now I have it down, just when you start to see it in an Talbots catalogue, yarrrr) fashion mortals from fashion deities, just ask Audrey Hepburn, or Giovanna Battaglia…. Or Konca.

Well fine fine. Poof! That’s it.

Ah yes. If one day you see a photo of me wearing my jacket all super effortlessly over my shoulders, don’t be fooled.

It will have been surely staged.

Translation : Tim Sullivan