You remember when I met Amber in Dallas? I totally thought her red hair was natural. Doesn’t it look really natural?
Then when I asked her how she does her hair, she said, “I color it myself!”

JEALOUSY.

Pffff, a red like that… I just love it.

But then I stick it in the pile of “stuff not even worth dreaming about.” I’m a brunette, which means that to get to red I’d have to bleach my head. In other words, it’d be a classic example of CTWWW (Craziest Thing in the Whole Wide World)

Amber here is blonde. It’s not hard for her at all. It takes her an hour to dye her hair (Clairol 6R) and then it’s done.

INJUSTICE.

Coloring my hair myself not only takes me three hours, but I leave my entire bathroom in ruins. I end up dying all my towels, my arms (I HAVE to do a post about this. It’ll crack you up just how ridiculous I get), and on top of all that, I was saying this the other day but it never works on my grey hairs that are starting to rear their ugly heads, the bastards.

CREEPING OLDNESS.

And I don’t want to go all the way to the salon to get my hair colored. I can’t justify it for my simple brown head. Because as much as I could spend hours getting massages, I get bored to death at hair salons. And if you want to really keep a good color, you have to go every three weeks. And coloring takes FOREVER!!!
So I’ll keep trying at home (and follow all of your advice, one by one) until I find the magic formula.

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY.

No, really : If the day comes that I definitively decide that I’m incapable of doing my own hair color and that I have to go to the salon to get it done, then
I’ll go red, like Amber.

SO, IT’LL NEVER HAPPEN.

JEALOUSY.

And remember I was told it wouldn’t even work that well on me. Can you see me a ginger?

NOOOOO I COULD NEVER DO THAT TO TAYLOR TOMASI HILL.

Everyone would get us mixed up. Don’t you worry, Taylor, I’ll stay brunette. Wouldn’t want to steal your fashion week thunder. I’ll stay as brunette as can be.

I’M SO NICE.