Honestly, they’re hell. They’re just not practical. They’re annoying, let in big drafts of cold air, you can’t wear a shoulder bag with them, can’t hail a taxi, yet still, even with all that, I’m a fan fan fan fan fan of the cape.

I found one at Zara like twelve seasons ago and I wore it so much that last time I saw my sister she forbid me to ever wear it again (only a sister or a very good friend can put out a veto like that and have it stick) saying that it looked like “an old sofa” (???). I listened to her and got rid of it – but not without a few tears first…

Here, a photo if you’d like… See how happy I look with my cape? Even if I couldn’t really figure out how to comfortably wear my bag or my camera?


[Photo by Scott, The Sartorialist]

Ever since, I’ve been on the cape market and I still haven’t found one I like.
In other words, my capimental life is a desert.

I tried wearing my coat over my shoulders as to give the illusion of wearing a cape but let’s face it: it just isn’t the same. When you have your coat on your shoulders the attitude all too often randomly switches off between “super cool girl” (when you enter a room with a determined air and your jacket magically resting on your shoulders) and “loser who would sell her mom to look fashionable” (when you try to get your phone out and your jacket slips off your shoulders onto the ground and have to put on that forced smile that says “I’m super fashionable but have a sense of humor too, hihihi!”

A cape is not like a loose coat… It’s a professional accessory: There are always two or three ways to keep it in place… Sometimes it’s buttons near the collar, sometimes it’s a cleverly placed zipper, sometimes it’s a little vent for your arms to have more freedom and keep it in place.

(PS: If your cape doesn’t have any of these features, it’s time to face the facts… You’ve purchased a blanket.)

Okay, all of this is here to say that I…

1/ am envious of anyone I see with a cape, even watching Man Of Steel was tough.
2/ sometimes wonder if I should just put some velcro on one of my jackets.
3/ know that capes are pretty 2011, but just don’t care (the only thing is I can’t throw my hands in the air)
4/ will end up in a puff jacket anyway because it’s 20 below in NYC.
5/ can I wear a puff jacket as a cape?
6/ even if I figure out a way to keep it in place?
7/ I can’t?
8/ Help me find a cape?
9/ Especially because the sales are coming up, eheh.
10/ Do I just have to get over my delusions of being a caped crusader?

Voilà. Next time I’ll talk to you about all my non-winter shoes. Seriously though, my feet are so cold. Aren’t yours?

(In the picture, deliriously delicious Reed Krakoff boots that I had introduced you to here.)